Story #2009

Before I begin with the main part of the story, I must preface with how Pvt. H introduced herself to the Drill Sergeants and the rest off us on day one. We just started the telling each other and the Drill Sergeants about why we joined the the army as well as the Military Police Corps (that’s right crayon eaters, POG story, there might be words contains more than four letters, no sock puppets and crayons to make this easier to understand) Pvt H stood up and told us she joined the Army because when she was in JROTC she was the “Military Police” commander and she was told by her instructors that she was born to lead and she will never give up,iron will the whole 9. Needless to say we were smoked for her referencing JROTC as the Drill Sergeants mocked her for being a “leader”

So on the final ruck March Pvt H was in front of me, she carrying her M4 and rucksack and I was carrying a SAW and ruck. Well about a working mile into the ruck.Pvt. H began limping and making whining sounds. Drill Sergeant A, a little 5 foot Drill Sergeant who fed off the souls of dead Haj, and threw HUMVEES for PT, came sprinting up and began to rain hate, “what’s the matter H, can’t go for a walk?, you couldn’t couldn’t lead shit from a cow’s ass to the ground”. They took her ruck and gave it to me, and again a mile later she was limping and whining, Drill Sergeant A came back around, “what the fuck H, you have no ruck, does P (me) need to carry your rifle too?” Now in possession of her rifle , she continued to whine and so forth and then all the Drill Sergeants started to berate her, ” didn’t you do rucks in ROTC Commander?, and more of a similar rhetoric. Then the First Sergeant came by, picked her up and had me fireman carry her the last 3 miles and First Sergeant then started yelling, “H, you couldn’t ducking lead the Afghan Army to a school full of boys at a nudist colony.”

Except for exhaustion and the fact all the Drills were near by, I almost exploded into laughter.

Submitted September 24, 2015